Amy Morin, a Psychotherapist, shares seven common traits of mentally strong children and how parents can help their children in that.
It’s an answer to the question many parents ask. Amy believes developing children’s’s mental strength is one of the best types that can help them be their best selves and thrive through life’s situations.
“Mental health requires three things,” She mentioned. “The way you think, feel and act. Thinking big, feeling good and acting brave helps us grow our mental muscles.” Although it takes time, patience and constant practice for it to manifest naturally, it’s not new for young child achieve it over time.
1. They empower themselves.
Most mentally strong children know how to make themselves happy. They don’t rely on others to feel good. Hardly, do they allow someone else’s success make them feel inferior. For instance, they decide to stay in a bright mood even when those around them are having a bad or try to take their anger, frustration, etc. on them
2. They create and use catch phrases.
Catch phrases are phrases that children can repeat to themselves. Preferably, these phrases should be short and easy to memorise. Examples of these include; “I am strong, smart, enough, … ” The use of these words show that they’re in control of their thoughts, emotions and actions. They out shadow the negative voices children make have in their head that makes them feel incapable of succeeding at something.
3. They adapt to change.
Some changes can be unpleasant. They can cause children to miss certain places or people or cause them to worry about how a change can affect their lives negatively. This change may be in form of moving to a new neighborhood, or being quarantined due to a pandemic. However, mentally strong children understand that change is important for their development into an even greater version of themselves. Children should be encouraged to talk vividly about their emotions (anxiety, sadness) instead of fighting them. Naming our emotions lessens the effects of our negative emotions.
4. They know when to say no.
Saying no for some children is a struggle because it can make them feel strange or uncomfortable. Yet, in some situations, saying no makes you stronger. It requires some amount of courage, and gathering it reveals how easier it gets over time. It also reduces the stress of obligations that one did not want to commit to. Teach your children polite ways to turn offer down like; “No, I’m not able to” (No explanation is required all the time), “Thanks for inviting me but I’ve got other plans”, ” I don’t feel like doing that today, but I appreciate you asking “
4. They own their mistakes
Owning or accepting mistakes builds character. Children who do this recognize they are wrong and are mentally prepared to admit their mistakes. They also apologize and seek ways to avoid repeated the same mistakes in the future.
5. Celebrates the success of others
Jealousy is normal in children due to certain possessions or competion failures and victories. It may make them feel unsatisfied. Encourage your ward to be supportive and happy for others when they do something great. Encourage them to also act as if they were their role models, not like they were a clone of them. This will make them feel good about themselves and make it easier for them to celebrate the success of others.
6. They fail… And they try again
Failure hurts, it can be disgraceful, disheartening and frustrating but it’s also inevitable. In order to grow ones mental muscles, a child must keep trying to achieve their goals even after failing. Children who become successful in their later life paid attention to why they failed and coreected them. They have a developed mindset that enables them to transform failures into positive experiences they can learn from. Researchers say children who discover that many successful people began with failures perform better afterwards.
7. They persist
While, achieving your set goals take time and patience, your brain my try to convince you to give up. Many mentally strong children continue even when their emotions and thoughts don’t align. They often gain victory and realised a new strength they weren’t aware of before. Have your children write themselves a letter of encouragement when they feel like giving up. It inspires them to continue trying.